From the Children

Be firm with me; it lets me know where I stand.
I know that I can't have everything I ask for---I'm only testing you.

Avoid using force with me. Forcing me, teaches that power is all that counts. I will respond more readily when given choices that are acceptable to both you and me.

Be consistent. I don't like being confused. When I'm confused, I work harder to get away with everything I can.

Make only promises you will be able to keep, so that I can learn to trust you.

When I say, "I hate you, " I don't mean it. I just want you to feel sorry for what you have done to me.

Allow me to do things I can do for myself. Otherwise, I feel like a baby and I might continue to put you in my service.

See me when I am good. Giving me attention for my bad habits only encourages me to continue them.

Give me the respect you would want and correct me in private. I take much more notice if I am not embarrassed.

My hearing is not at its best when I'm involved in a conflict, nor is my ability to cooperate. I'll do the action required and we can talk about it later when I can be more objective about it.

I value my mistakes-I learn from them. Please allow me to make mistakes and learn from them without feeling like I am no good.

It is a natural defense for me to appear deaf when someone is telling me something over and over.

I really don't know why I make poor choices sometimes, so please don't ask me.

I learn from experiment. It's my nature and I learn from it.

I would rather get attention for feeling good than for my ailments.

When I ask honest questions, I trust I will get honest answers. I am building my reality of the world from what you tell me. Also, simple answers work best for me. Long explanations might not make connections in my brain of limited experience.

I will readily accept your apologies to me. An honest apology makes me feel surprisingly warm toward you. After all, we all make mistakes.

If you suggest that you are perfect or infallible to me, it gives me too much to live up to.

Please model courage for me - I have a lot to face in my lifetime.

I need lots of understanding and encouragement.

Please treat me the way you treat your friends so that I can be your friend, too.

Remember, I need models, and you are one of them.